My face flashes from grimacing to batting lashes,
from hope to fear, from please to thanks,
to challenging, to I
Tag: anxiety
Conflict
The long letters that are so cathartic are forbidden,
and why should no one like to read what others heal to simply say?
Why should no one will to listen so well, for so long?
Why am I so rude for asking them to try?
Child of the Open Air
Grabbing my toes,
I pull my butt out from beneath me,
flip me upside down,
and shake.
I plop her back on her butt and smack
her back and wait
and wait and wait
for her to burp, spit or vomit,
or to drop from any pocket
I, female, lie in bed
I, female, lie in bed
dressed in Clark’s flannel shirt.
It is soft, encompassing, swallowing, immersing-
Like love,
but less human, less active, less person.
It smells like active, human person, though.
I deeply inhale his lingering traces,
trying to fill my shell with as much humanity as I can.
I cradle halves of soft fabric across my torso,
trying to touch as much person as possible,
to be swallowed, encompassed, immersed in,
and buried by something soft.
Kendra pokes her head in the door.
The rest of her follows.
She hovers above me, calls me, hugs me,
drops, puts her head on my bed, and cries-
She is too strong to ignore the pain, but too weak to fix it.
I invite her into my bed.Read More »
Counterproductivity
Only five times each day, I play like my bed frame
is a tweed lounge seat, my shelf is a welcome desk,
you are my friend by choice, and things are like they used to be-
You here to pay attention like you would have better things to do,
if it weren’t for the fact that I am your best.
Behind closed doors, I mime conversation with transparent friend,
all for imagined your strong, silent type observance.
This poem wasn’t supposed to be embarrassing, but I am
Read More »
Rocks
I feel the cold stone ‘neath my toes,
and I feel I exist outside of me,
on the surface of this body they’ll label
“Lydia” and point to once I’m dead.
My eyes close. I stare at my eyelids,
and now I feel I’m inside of me-
Oh help! Please someone,
get me out!
I inside and outside of me…
Is me my body? Then who I am?
Me might be nothing, for that’s what I see
every single time I blink.
I open my eyes and see that my toesRead More »
My favorite moment
My favorite moment?
Likely my worst one,Read More »
Caress
By one caress, my fingers had met
the last of the warts
that reside on your hand.
By one year of caressing, however,
you’d encountered the first of the
burns that traverse
my fingers.
I kiss your abnormalities,Read More »
Fear
Love is a jerk,
a cruel-hearted beast
with a gap-toothed grin
and a cigarette.
Sometimes life has those moments
Sometimes life has those moments.
They’re the moments where you’re happy,
peaceful, joyful, free. And you’re not
alone. They’re the moments when you don’t even want
to jump out your window and run away
or make a cup of tea to cling to,
as though drinking it might keep you alive or sane.Read More »
Alphabet Ravine 