She throws me curveballs and crises like they’re tree limbs,
car parts, and siding that’s gotten ripped off.
She bats astonished eyes at me, says I never flinch.
I glance past her to all I’ve juggled before-
Lost keys, new jeeps, holes in walls, illegal rides,Read More »
she keeps throwing around the term abuse
It was, of course, after the pastor said
that emotional memory can make up details that seem to fit the feeling we felt,
and after you confided in me all about your power to cave-
how you are her sane and grace, while she’s stuck irrational,
but you understand- because I understand! I always understand.
Read More »
Counterproductivity (feat. in Amphora Magazine)
Only five times each day, I play like my bed frame
is a tweed lounge seat, my shelf is a welcome desk,
you are my friend by choice, and things are like they used to be-
You here to pay attention like you would have better things to do,
if it weren’t for the fact that I am your best.
Behind closed doors, I mime conversation with transparent friend,
all for imagined your strong, silent type observance.
This poem wasn’t supposed to be embarrassing, but I am
Read More »
one-way streets
You’re walking on eggshells, and everything you do to try to make it better backfires,
since some people don’t want to be satisfied.
Vindictive vendettas taken out on you,
like some people need something to be mean to,
and if they see you as a person, you can’t be their thing,
so they call you a problem and use you for their pain,
when their hate is their own fault,
and there’s nothing you can do
to make someone understand what they choose not to-Read More »
Gracia
And grace
slapped me
across the face
and I didn’t know
what to do
with it.
I tried to give it back ‘cuz I didn’t want it,
but, oh, grace knew me better than that.
I tried to give it back ‘cuz I didn’t deserve it,
but grace knew herself well as well.
The skin on my cheeks started
tingling,
burning-
sudden, foreign,
strange,
“Make it stop!”
But we can’t make such strength do nothing,
and grace was after me,
so I ran, but, oh, it was before me too-
Alpha, Omega,
“I am that I am”.
Love you forever
You called like a god, celebrity
or college freshman,
so I put my Nair down, wrapped a towel around my shame,
glued my wet ear to the fragile phone, said hello
instead of, “Why me?” and let you worship, effuse like I
was way more than the wallpaper at my brother’s parties.
I’d been the entertainment once, back before the parties-
whispering nicknames and manipulations, like a kid sister alone can.
That was back before you, drivers licenses,
meet ups. But you were not before forsaken plans,Read More »
What good is paper now?
I’ve got a list of adjectives, but you’re the poem.
Your eyes an image, your hands the parallels,
your mouth the irony, your actions so loud.
Steady as a repetition, boldness your surprise-Read More »
Unfriending People (Elizabeth Browning, The Cardigans)
How does he love you? He counted the ways,
but I don’t know many ways to say
to you, “Love me.”
“…love me, say that you love me…”
Come back to-
Come to me for first of times.
Well, you can stop not loving me now…
Can stop doing all of the things that you do!
Not paying attention, not first tuning in.
To not respond. Not care. Not like.
Never be curious. Never look up.
Not see. Not ask. Not tell. Not try.
Anyone! More, you only ones- I don’t think that this hope will die.
Oh, but I trust that this dream would dim,
if I would rest
and turn out your light.
On Being Big-Hearted
Minuscule heart!Read More »
Smog
Lock your irises up and to the right,
summoning mine. Let your side stand square,
your hips too scared. Stare these pupils,
sheltered by my arched brows, down. I can barely see
you through your eyes’ fear. But I know better than
to call such your name, bold challenger, chasing the guards
from the gate of your soul, welcoming my power to
assume your worth, envisioning yourself to be embracing my heart-
my heart you shrouded, mistook for my mere humanity.
Alphabet Ravine 